I saw 10,000 news stations stirrin up anger

I saw neighbors and friends feeding the hungry

I saw teachers and students all doing their best

I saw 1000s of people fighting for toilet paper

I saw my people make music in the front yard

I saw an orange man who talked about nothing

And its a hard, its a hard, its a hard, its a hard, its a hard rain, that’s fallin. (Except its Sunny.)

(my current version of Dylan’s “Hard Rain’s Gonna Fall” – here’s my favorite version, by Edie Brickell and the New Bohemians: https://youtu.be/kgpF5VjWO34

Here are some other things I’ve seen:

Morning Magic~ revisitation to Source
Poem art (from previous blog post) watercolor and ink

Some poetry from my morning pages:

This morning,

I awoke to the sound of an alarm too early set.

After dreams of my old friend suffering, rightfully so, I wanted some peaceful moments.

So after an hour of mind trickery and snooze,

I lifted my head.

The space we create is our own.

Nothing in this life is guaranteed,

Except change, choice, and the love and care we give our very own home.

This is exhausting. They are being a pain in the ass.

I went guerrilla shopping for my grandparents and brought them a ton of food the other day and then said “Please let me go to the grocery store for you, it’s dangerous to go for so many reasons.” They said OK!

Then today, about 10 minutes ago, I get a call and my grandmother says, “We’re headed to the grocery store. I need some chocolate milk and some other little things.” I’m flabbergasted and my jaw hit the ground, “I can do that for you Maw Maw! Remember?” To which she says “oh it’s just a few things…” To which I said “it doesn’t matter how much you need, it’s the fact that you’re going into a place where it’s deceptively possible for you to get a virus that could kill you. I don’t want that. You don’t want that, let me go to the grocery store for you!” To which she argued… Round and round we went.

To add insult to injury, on the poor side of town in Burlington North Carolina, the Food Lion does not offer curbside pick up. In fact, when I called to try and see if that were the case, they wouldn’t answer my phone call. She has to go to that Food Lion because that’s the brand of chocolate milk that she wants. 🤦🏻‍♀️

They are determined to go out in this and put themselves at risk. I’m going to have to exercise a boundary that I don’t go to their house after this. I don’t wanna put my roommates in danger just because my grandparents won’t be careful… God what fucked up times these are… Please pray for them. If you have any advice, please feel free to share with me about how to deal with this.

What’s the news? You’ve heard, I’m sure, there’s something serious going around. Being at home all day however, didn’t stop me from not having enough time to get everything done I wanted, but such is life for a creative person who is easily distracted, accepts it and finds that trait beautiful at times.

In the meantime, I learned about the box elder tree who is the “trashy cousin” (according to one professor at Michigan State University) and looks a lot like poison ivy to which I am highly allergic.

I added some more fine pen detail to a barn owl painting until my felt tip .01 Staedler ran out of juice.

This morning I heard a woodpecker, saw at least 12 different kinds of other birds while drinking my coffee on the back porch as I am growing accustomed now that it’s a bit warmer outside. I noticed that the sea gulls seem to have taken off.

The Kinks’ Sunny Afternoon played ALL DAY in my brain, I wrote a letter and sent it and screwed a board to my garden.

Tonight for dinner, I made salmon cakes, green beans, and baked sweet potato waffle fries with a homemade coconut yogurt/garlic remoulade, heavy pickles.

To the background music of 90s hip hop, I danced in my room for the first time since I can remember and I’m going to bed before 2:00am the first time in several days.

…and that doesn’t come close to all that happened or what I accomplished today. Crazy. #hemmingcurtains #preziclasswork #textingwithstudents #sponsormeeting #staredoutthewindow #syllabuscalibration

This pandemic is trembling under the surface of my constant tension. A walk in the rain calmed me down. This time for us all will be both inspiring and mystifyingly sad around the world. That’s why this episode of TuesDay NewsDay is a bit different. We each carry the weight of the bags we picked up. Let someone carry your bag during this time if they offer. If they don’t offer, ask for help with your burdens.

I love you all in many ways. Bless those having to be out there in it. Bless my students and their heavy loads. Bless my friends who love me. Thank you to those who reach out. You have no idea what it means. Give what you can, expect nothing.

Box elder maple in early Spring, the world goes on with or without us. I like to think we give ourselves to it when we pass. We become the world. The world becomes us.
It looks good on you.

The assignment w/my scribble annotations…

I asked my students to complete a testimonial now that their spring break is officially over. These are some of the responses some of them are tearjerking and some of them are funny but I think this is a good exercise for them to share their feelings and thoughts. I plan to share more, anonymously of course. #testimonials #covid_19 #springbreak2020 #journaling #online #onlineschool #communitycollege #criticalthinking #class #quarantine #socialdistancing Lets call it #Physicaldistancing that’s better, we need our #sociallife #virtual #virtualhugs #burlingtonnc #grahamnc #alamancecounty #reallife #teacher #teacherlife #virtualclassroom

Hey yall, It’s Tuesday.  The Earth turned into the Sun again today.  The clouds parted so that we may feel the warmth of that Sun too.  For those things and more, I am hella grateful.  Please see the passage below.  I am re-reading this little book called Practicing Peace and it speaks to every ounce of what is happening in the world right now and how we can all choose to evolve through these times.  Pema on Racial Injustice

Dedication: To everyone. All the people. All the animals. All the plants. All the Spirits.

Quote:  Practicing Peace by Pema Chödrön.  “War begins when we harden our hearts, and we harden them easily— in minor ways and then in quite serious, major ways, such as hatred and prejudice—whenever we feel uncomfortable. It’s so sad, really, because our motivation in hardening our hearts is to find some kind of ease, some kind of freedom from the distress that we’re feeling. Someone once gave me a poem with a line in it that offers a good definition of peace: “softening what is rigid in our hearts.” We can talk about ending war and we can march for ending war, we can do everything in our power, but war is never going to end as long as our hearts are hardened against each other.

What happens is a chain reaction, and I’d be surprised if you didn’t know what I’m talking about. Something occurs—it can be as small as a mosquito buzzing—and you tighten. If it’s more than a mosquito—or maybe a mosquito is enough for you—something starts to shut down in you, and the next thing you know, imperceptibly the chain reaction of misery begins: we begin to fan the grievance with our thoughts. These  thoughts become the fuel that ignites war. War could be that you smash that little teensy-weensy mosquito. But I’m also talking about war within the family, war at the office, war on the streets, and also war between nations, war in the world.

We often complain about other people’s fundamentalism. But whenever we harden our hearts, what is going on with us? There’s an uneasiness and then a tightening, a shutting down, and then the next thing we know, the chain reaction begins and we become very righteous about our right to kill the mosquito or yell at the person in the car or whatever it might be. We ourselves become fundamentalists, which is to say we become very self-righteous about our personal point of view.

…The next time you get angry, check out your righteous indignation, check out your fundamentalism that supports your hatred of this person, because this one really is bad—this politician, that leader, those heads of big companies. Or maybe it’s rage at an individual who has harmed you personally or harmed your loved ones. A fundamentalist mind is a mind that has become rigid. First the heart closes, then the mind becomes hardened into a view, then you can justify your hatred of another human being because of what they represent and what they say and do.

…If you look back at history or you look at any place in the world where  religious groups or ethnic groups or racial groups or political groups are killing each other, or families have been feuding for years and years, you can see—because you’re not particularly invested in that particular argument— that there will never be peace until somebody softens what is rigid in their heart. So it’s necessary to take a big perspective on your own righteousness and your own fundamentalism when it begins to kick in and you think your own aggression and prejudice are reasonable.

I try to practice what I preach; I’m not always that good at it but I really do try. The other night, I was getting hard-hearted, closed-minded, and fundamentalist about somebody else, and I remembered this expression that you can never hate somebody if you stand in their shoes. I was angry at him because he was holding such a rigid view. In that instant I was able to put myself in his shoes and I realized, “I’m just as riled up and self-righteous and closed minded about this as he is. We’re in exactly the same place!” And I saw that the more I held on to my view, the more polarized we would become, and the more we’d be just mirror images of one another—two people with closed minds and hard hearts who both think they’re right, screaming at each other. It changed for me when I saw it from his side, and I was able to see my own aggression and ridiculousness.

Image result for pema chodronIf you could have a bird’s-eye perspective on the Earth and could look down at all the conflicts that are happening, all you’d see are two sides of a story where both sides think they’re right. So the solutions have to come from a change of heart, from softening what is rigid in our hearts and minds.”

Practicing Peace Mini-Book PDF

 

Song: I Want To Be Here – by Neko Case, here’s the video Bruce and I played for today with this song, recorded by my awesome roommate, Andrea. InstaVideoSongPost

Dear Humans,

The excerpt from above means a lot to me.  I wish I could somehow transfer this sentiment of softening our hearts to every human on this planet.  Some people know this already, but some people don’t and would never agree… so we’d have to sneak it in while they were sleeping.  We could send a little whisper of Love into their ears via magic fairy dust or something they couldn’t successfully shake out or wash off in the morning.  I don’t have much to say that Pema didn’t already about all that’s happening out there in the world.  I wish everyone rest and a calm heartbeat.  I wish everyone food in their bellies and enough resources to provide for what they need.  I wish for marginalized people to have some peace of mind and heart.  I wish those in power would use it for the betterment of society instead of to its detriment.  I wish for people’s hearts to soften and to feel what it is that could truly save this world, Love.  (and 6 feet of temporary personal space…)  Goodnight y’all.